As a family member or significant others of the addict in treatment, people will likely barrage you with questions about how the addict is doing. Before disclosing anything, it's wise to discuss the situation with the addict's primary therapist. The therapist is best placed to assess the situation and determine the best course of action and method of disclosure. If disclosure is the course of action, here are some tips to keep in mind for addiction in the family

It's unnecessary to discuss addiction or the mental illness to relatives you don't know or rarely see.  sometimes family intervention is what it takes for immediate family(addiction), it's better to provide an honest explanation than to lie.

 

With a young child, explain that the person in treatment is sick and being taken care of by a special doctor. If your child is older than 8-years-old, you can explain the basic concept of addiction: say it is a disease that the person cannot control by himself and requires a doctor's assistance. If the child has been privy to the behaviors of the addict, give more details. For example, explain that daddy has a disease that includes drinking alcohol, and that when he drinks, he behaves badly. Ensure that the child understands they are not responsible for the addict's problem.

 

It is crucial to explain to children that they are not to blame for the illness and behavior and they cannot cure or control the addict. Honesty destigmatizes addiction and mental illness and assists a child to become more understanding of addiction and mental disorders. It also assures safety. Warn your kids never to ride in a car driven by someone who has been drinking, looks or sounds intoxicated or smells like alcohol. Parents should also determine and arrange alternate places to go when a family member is intoxicated or under the influence of drugs.

 

By all means do not make empty promises. Neither you nor the addict should promise a child that they have been cured. Remember that a relapse can occur at anytime and if it does, promises will be broken and relationships hurt. Tell your loved ones that the addict is doing the best he can to get well. While abstinence is a possibility, it will take time for the addict to change "dry drunk" behavior and emotions. (Nevertheless, it is wrong to pretend or try to hide the fact that you are upset about your loved one's illness.)

 

Also take note that different children react differently to a loved one's addiction(addiction for families): some will actually feel a sense of relief when the addict leaves home and enters treatment, others will fear the addict's return home while many others will experience separation anxiety when the addict leaves the household. The responsibility of providing your kids with lots of love and assurance remains yours.

 

Moreover it is imperative to recognize that young children and teens will often act out when separation occurs. For example, toddlers and young children may wet or soil themselves; older children may become angry, defiant, withdrawn or depressed. Communication is key. Patience, affection and reassurances are paramount; and family involement with Alanon and Naranon is ALWAYS recommended.